


you're so gorgeous, it actually hurts

by transzoemurphy



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Crush on best friend, Crushes, Jared Kleinman Is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining Jared, Pre Canon, Sports, Sunscreen, Swim Meet, Swimming, Takes place in Texas, albeit he does it unintentionally, evan hansen is bad at not giving jared a gay crisis, how do i tags, inner monologue, mentions of transphobia, pining for a friend, swimmer evan, uhhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 10:36:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18408911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transzoemurphy/pseuds/transzoemurphy
Summary: Jared is a Good Friend (/pining gay disaster) helping Evan get ready for a swim meet.the title is from gorgeous by taylor swift





	you're so gorgeous, it actually hurts

**Author's Note:**

> op doesnt know anything about sports and thats pretty lit of me tbh

 

Fuck, dude. Evan was like... _really hot._ When did he get so hot? What the fuck? This was homophobic and probably illegal.

"You're gonna do fine, dude, really." Jared crossed his arms and then uncrossed them again, shoving a hand in his pocket.

"You sure?"

Evan was wearing his swim trunks and a blue Hawaiian shirt (unbuttoned). _God_ , he was hot. His stomach looked soft but it still had definition and his arms were muscled too and Jared was trying not to think about the downright sinful things Evan could do with his arms. And his _hands_. Jesus Christ, nevermind, not the time.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Jared said, remembering what he was supposed to be doing. "Evan, you're fifteen years old and you can't put on your own sunscreen?"

"Some spots are hard to reach," Evan whined.

"Jesus Christ, bro." He shook his head and Evan shrugged off his Hawaiian shirt. "Do everything else, I'll get your back and shoulders."

"Okay." Evan shook his hair out of his eyes and started rubbing sunscreen on his arms. Jared was just glad he was relatively capable of doing it himself. If he had to carefully rub sunscreen onto Evan Hansen's thighs he might spontaneously combust.

"I dunno, dude, Jamie's pretty fast."

"Jamie's, like, barely five feet tall."

"Yeah, but they're _fast_."

"So? You're faster."

"What if I'm not?"

"You'll be fine, oh my god."

Evan had finished his arms and chest and had moved on to his thighs, which was killing Jared. He could feel his heart speeding up like he was having a heart attack. God, the headlines would have a field day with that. _Fifteen Year Old Dies Of Homosexuality-Induced Heart Attack_. He could already see the news articles popping up in people's recommended.

"What about Steven?"

"What _about_ him?"

"He's fast."

"He's clumsy. He doesn't have the advantage of agility that you do."

"Grant?"

"All charisma, no talent."

"Okay, but what about Carter? The guy's, like, made of muscle."

"Yeah. He's not very aerodynamic. Or whatever the water equivalent is."

Evan handed the sunblock to Jared. "You play a lot of D&D for a heterosexual."

"Evan, you've known I was gay since, like, fifth grade." Jared poured some of the sunscreen onto his hand and tried to rub it into Evan's shoulders and back without keeling over dead. Evan's skin was so soft. And he had these freckles on his shoulders and back that were both cute and hot.

"Emily could beat me. She's strong. And it's really unfair that they're still making her swim with the boys. Jamie doesn't really have a choice, which sucks for them, but like, Emily is fully socially transitioned and she passes, like, all the time, so let her swim with the girls!"

"It sucks. It's shitty. But this is Texas, man. Nobody listens to the gay kids in Texas."

"Yeah." Jared sighed and tried not to think about some things he wanted to listen to Evan say sometime. God, he was gay. He was really fucking gay. This wasn't funny anymore, it was just sad.

He finished with the sunscreen and handed it back to Evan, hoping his blush wasn't as red as he thought it was.

"Ready?" Evan asked, pulling on his button-up and throwing a towel over his shoulder.

"I'm not the one racing today, dumbass," Jared responded, elbowing him in the side.

"Ow! Asshole."

The two boys went out the door and walked up to the fork in the path together.

"So long, partner." Jared saluted him.

"Sad yeehaw," Evan responded. "Brofist..."

"Good luck," Jared said. He stood on his toes to ruffle Evan's hair.

"Asshole," Evan said affectionately.

The two went their separate ways, Evan to the pool area, Jared to the stands, where he grabbed a seat on the end next to a girl in a sundress, heart-shaped glasses, and a huge hat.Jared sipped absently from the orange can of Monster he held as he waited.

The announcement bell finally went off about five minutes later.

"Our contestants today, from left to right, are J. McConnell, E. Hansen, E. Martin, J. Stevenson, S. Klisgetch, G. Baker, and C. Guilliame!” They’d started referring to the contestants by their first initial once Emily had her name legally changed, which Jared found kind of grossly transphobic, but whatever.

The cheering began and Jared clapped his hands over his ears for the worst of it before joining in the clapping.

"This is the boy's 400 meter freestyle," the announcer said. "Ready, get set," Jared covered his ears again as the gunshot announced the start of the race. Quickly after, he braced his hands on his knees and watched intensely.

He always wondered what it was about the water that put Evan so at ease. As he moved through the water, he looked completely calm.

He was also _super_ cute. He was practically drooling. It wasn't his fault, really, that Evan had such gorgeous muscles, and it really couldn't be blamed on Jared at all that Evan's skin looked so soft, and the freckles that dotted his shoulders might have made a blush rise on his cheeks, but Jared couldn't be held accountable for that.

The way his muscles moved was also incredibly attractive. Jared was transfixed. God, he really _was_ a useless gay. He saw _one_ pretty boy and immediately the world stopped turning.

The group were on their third one hundred meters — the final stretch. Jared's eyes were glued to the pool. He wanted Evan to win. He wanted to see the smile that would light up his face as he realised he'd done it.

Jared shoved his glasses back so they didn't fall as he stood to get a better look. Around him, the crowd cheered and he covered his ears again, squinting into the sunlight. Evan and Jason seemed to be tied neck-to-neck, both of them powering through the last bit of the race.

Jared was practically out of his seat now, and the crowd around him was going wild, and he squinted as—

 _Evan hit the buzzer first._ Jared screamed at the top of his lungs, beaming as the contestants began climbing out of the water. Evan unlocked the gate as Jared bolted over and gave him a tight hug, not giving a fuck about his now-soaked clothes or his presumed heterosexuality.

"Evan, you're soaking," Jared said. There was too much skin here. What was he supposed to do with this much skin? _God_.

"Sorry," Evan said, not sounding sorry.

"You did great, bro." Jared stepped back and elbowed him.

"Thanks," Evan grinned. He ran back inside to grab his trophy and then dodged through the crowd again to Jared, his Hawaiian shirt flowing in the breeze. "C'mon, I won two free passes to get some slushies."

"Holy _shit_ , sign me up."

**Author's Note:**

> 90% of Jared's inner monologue is "hhhh evanb hansen HOT" u cant change my mind. find me on tumblr @trans-zoe-murphy if u would like More of Me. also did u know evan has the big gay !?


End file.
